Saturday, March 28, 2009

One of the beautiful things to appreciate in life is dawn. As i lie here on the parade ground ( this was written originally around 4 am on the 18th of march 2009) it is dark and the only thing I can see in the expanse of the sky is the moon.
The shape of the moon is more half moon than crescent. The highlight of the crescent is truly beautiful. It strikes me as a half slice of pizza, tempting and inviting you to reach out to it!
The canopy of the sky is littered with stars, shiny dusty speckles up there.
As the dawn breaks into daylight the stars slowly fade out, I am saddend to see them go but I notice I am able to see clearer, the outline of the man infront of me is more visible. I feel a tug in my heart as the darkness fades away and the light takes it place. The moon is still there as it has not given way to the sun.
I lie back wondering when the sun shall graces us with it's glorious prescence.
The sky is now bluish gray with smattering touches of pink. The gray highlights are from the clouds as they gracefully enter this stage. This canopy of light, colour and beauty.
I'm trully awed by the awesome power of God.
It is now 7 a.m and my Pizza slice moon is still visible, but here comes the most beautiful thing of all time... as the slice slowly fades awat it is looking more like a crescent and it is right there on the left side of my canopy of nature. On the right hand is a great ball of light. It is Orange and it is bright. It is slowly climbing up to take it's place. In it's full glory, the sun is rising.
I do not believe I can fully describe in mere words what I am seeing and experiencing.
As i watch in amazement,I see a juxtapositon between nature and man-made. I see the sunlight peeking from behind a tree, but then i see a power pole right beside the tree. The cables all strung across from pole to pole and then this bright light overshadowing it all. The light of the sun effusing really brightly behind the tree and the pole.
I couldn't have asked for a better way to start my day!

Monday, March 2, 2009

These things we do

Being single evokes a lot of feelings in me. This is partly because a lot of times I am thinking about how to get married, when to get married, why am I not even married!!! blah blah bla... and so the thoughts go on! Then somewhere along the line I ask myself, " So when you are married gaan sef, what do u now want to do" then I reply myself and say " then I can start my life"
But the truth is not a lot of women who get married have the desired effect they hope marriage will give, not a lot of women actually "start" their life in that sense and this is because women marry for various reasons.

Some marry to escape the pressures of their father's houses and end up finding out that men are the same everywhere, whether they are your parents or they are your husband! They are just "lords" in their own homes.
I have heard scary tales of men that beat their wives,men who are downright lazy and have just no ambition that you have to keep carrying them along, men that leave their wives for no reason, men who get drunk consistently, men who have absolutely no regard for their spouses!!!
Ah these men are everywhere, their ages range from 25 to 75..Yes!!! they are everywhere!!
I dont know the specie of men i fear the most; the one that has no ambition, or the one that has too much of it and will try to push me farther than I can go.
Then I stop and think, there are those women who get married because they are getting old.. yes I said the dreaded word " OLD" and they just need companionship. They envision a man growing old with them and holding their hand as they walk through the sands of time. But pray tell, what is companionship with a man who will never stay at home, or when he is home he drives you to your wits end!!!! Will it not be better if you were alone?
What about men that will not help around the house? they are the ones who cry the loudest that they want you to give them children and they are the ones who do not lift a finger in the work that comes with raising children??
Why do we do these things?
I know of a man who has refused to learn how to drive. You may think this is not a great issue but it is. It is such a big deal. How on earth will a man not be able to drive his family to places?????It just plain rattles me. There is something about getting behind the wheels and driving, it speaks of taking charge, it speaks of giving direction, it speaks quite loudly of what position the man has chosen to take in the family. He is more comfortable in the passenger's seat while "madam" ferries him and his children across the city.
So what happens when they are at a party and they need their car to be moved, then "madam" gets up to go and move her car out of the way??? It is just so unacceptable in our culture. Do you know what society is going to classify the woman as ? it will be said of her that she has 'used' the head of that man.. meanwhile no one is using any one's head.. the man is just plain lazy and doesn't wanna learn how to drive!!!!!
Please man who does not drive and has refused to learn, don't sit there in the passenger's sit and teach me how to maneuver the car from left to right or my head would just explode!!!!!!
So these things we do, wishing for men, wishing they would marry us, wishing they would stay with us... why do we do them??
Why do we wish for what may invariably shorten our lifespan?
We seek the ever so elusive "few good men" and when we dont find them we settle for the next best thing!
Because for whatever it is worth we need them for there to be balance, ( annonying though it may be) there is something in the touch of a man you loved( or have chosen to love) that makes you forget his inadequacies.Why is this so?
Don't ask me.. i don't claim to have all the answers!

A friend once wrote that she would like to have only sons, because she wants to be responsible for bringing some good men into the world. I laughed when i read it but I realised that in a way, our men are all flawed and it was our duty as mothers and mothers-to-be to bring up nice and decent men. Yes, good, decent,responsible men!

Sunday, March 1, 2009


There is a phenomenon which plagues the world,
It is probably the worlds most favourite one.

It is this strange pulling at ones heart which one feels towards another.

It is so strong it makes men do things they never would have, it makes women weaker than ever.
It generally makes you realise you are actually capable of more things than you actually thought you were.
It is deep, it is strong, when it latches onto you, it doesnt let go.

It is seen in the eyes of a mother, when she looks at a child which was just brought forth
It glistens in the tear we shed for a person so recently departed to the afterlife,
it is felt in the warmth of embrace of a man to the woman he intends to spend the rest of his life with.
It is evident in the face of a woman whose best friend has just helped out of a tight spot.

It is everywhere. Like air, you really cannot do without it

This thing called love,
it brings out beauty in blemish and radiates perfection in imperfections.