Thursday, May 7, 2009

Red

Something happens to me whenever I have a glass of red wine in my hand, I can not exactly place a finger to it and I can not aptly describe the feeling but it can best be described as " happiness" I hold on firmly to the stem as i swirl the contents in the glass, musing on life and on events around me. I have a clearer picture of things when I am in this mood, and like i said, i feel Happy!
But what does happiness entail really? happiness is something that eludes most of us as human beings. This is mainly because human beings by nature are not content with one thing and as such we end up chasing so many things at once (dreams) and never really getting the much elusive happiness... well except when you are slightly intoxicated like me.
The glass of red means alot to me, it calms me down, say for instance when I am nervous, i find some form of comfort.When I'm also too happy, I help myself to a glass, or two, depending on the happiness on a scale of 1 to 10. I guess this is how alcoholics feel in the early days, how they justify the need to slosh... or then,maybe not.!
I rememeber saving a bottle for celebrating the end of my Bar finals and I had kept the bottle for almost 6 months, with a plan to open and drink it all up with a friend of mine. Alas, on the last day of the exam while I was in the room waiting for my friend to come, she was somewhere so far away enjoying the bonfire night the student council had organised. So while waiting for her to return i started with the first glass, slipping as slowly as possible so that she could meet me at it. 3 hours later and there was no Boma, and the bottle was empty. I had finished a whole bottle of Red on my own. Ahh... even me i surprised myself! I ended up falling into deep deep sleep. Partly caused by the alcohol and partly because I had been sleep deprived for months, I had been running on auto pilot for months and I felt I needed to unwind.
But, I woke up and was terribly sick, gone was the ephemeral feeling of happiness. I had been thrilled and now here I was soaked in my own puke! ( I guess I must have over done it that day, or maybe I have a really low threshold for alcohol consumption) but my point is this, I took solace in something and I overdid it and the end result was not good at all.
Many times we have things which we turn to for comfort, something that takes us to our happy place, but then we end up over-doing it and we get the exact opposite of happiness.
So maybe moderation IS the key because, totally depending one one thing, one person, or one place as the source of your happiness will definately bring you unhappiness. (Ofcourse you all know God is the exception to this postulation of mine dont you?)
So I'm thinking, all this talk of red wine is leaving me with a craving... Cant wait to have my next glass off course in moderation, because I have learnt my lesson!

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